Return to lucidity and a session with the mirror

It has been a while since I had a lucid dream but Sunday morning I had two.
I was dreaming I was walking home after seeing Jo Jo the girl who helped me write the story last week. I was walking down my road when I noticed I was stepping further and higher than normal. I then decided to jump and went around 15 feet in the air. I realised I was dreaming and started to jump around each time going really high. This is not really normal for me as I tend to fly in lucid dreams. Looking around my road was sunny and I was crashing into people’s roofs braking slates and just enjoying myself.

I then thought I would go in my house but that failed and I woke up. Well I thought I did. I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and get dressed. Looking in the mirror though I noticed I had longer hair and was already dressed. I looked in the mirror aware I was dreaming. I noticed a few weird things like motion was out. The mirror just didn’t keep up with what I was doing. When moving closer to the mirror I was further away in mirror. Looking close up I could see my face looked as if it was made of parts. Like when a movie has static it appeared to have a static when looking close up. My lips and eyes were all moving out of sync and at some times just changed completely to a new set of facial parts.

Just to double check I was dreaming I switched the light on and off and nothing happened. I then went back to the mirror. I tried to change my hair style and it failed it was almost as if I wasn’t looking at myself but more of an image that was distorted and still some how connected to my movement.

I then woke up. Laid there for a bit to try and remember it all. I have a few problems with the dream I had. The main being why did I check the light switch a second time? If I was really lucid I would not have needed to do that. Thinking about it even when I was jumping around earlier in the dream I normally fly and I still felt gravity in my dream. This has made me think something which I had thought of before. Did I have a lucid dream or did I dream I had one? If the latter is true then the conciseness is three layers thick. I have mine now which I use to write this. I lower level which was confused by the dream but then become aware and the level that thought he was in control by taking over from the lower level.

Over the last few weeks I have had three lines, three lives and just generally having the number three going around in my head. I think it was related to the whole launch of BBC Three when they were going on about three being the magic number. How ever over the last few weeks I thought what if the number three had something about it. This is not the first time three has appeared and will likely not be the last. What if we do have three layers of conciseness and we are only layer two? Or what if we are layer one?

Maybe I just had a lucid dream.

Abandonment

The following is a story I have had for a long time but had forgotten till the BBC show Eastenders kind of showed it with the Stacey and Bradley 2010 live story line. The idea is loosely based on the love story of Titanic 1997. To write it as a story I have had to adapt it to a placement. My idea did not have a place in which it would happen, just a story of what happened.

FRIDAY
There was a young male called Joey aged 21 who lived in London Twickenham he lived with his parents and would go on holiday camping with them yearly they was not poor but not well off enough to afford trips aboard.

The family had decided to go caravanning to a caravan site near an old derelict theme park. Joey hated going away with his family and felt he was old enough to not have to go and spend a weekend in a little caravan with them. He did not really like camping or caravanning and felt it was just a way of his parents saving money. Joey was an only child and it meant he had to go everywhere with his parents.

The family arrived at the camp site and Joey saw a sign for a funfair which made Joey think this may not be that much of a waste of a journey anyway. He thought the only thing near by was the derelict theme park. Joey said to his parents he wanted to go to the carnival but they wanted him to help set up the caravan. Joey is used to helping his parents out or going on walks on their weekends away. He would rarely meet anyone interesting to him and found the time away boring. He helped his parents out like normal and then he left his parents alone and went to the funfair.

The funfair was one of those places brightly lit with a love for the colour red. There were games on stalls with various things to do, Hot Dog vans and fast food everywhere. There were hardly any rides unless you include riding a donkey than had gone to sleep already. In background there was the theme park that just looked so much better. The theme park had only closed down a few years back and still looked like the rides worked.

Joey was standing around having a beer when he saw one of the men telling a young dark haired medium height girl that could have only been around 19 or 20 that she can’t stand near the stall. Not thinking Joey just walked up and said hi and paid to use the stall. It was one of those stalls were you throw balls to hit the cans placed in pyramid but the cans are weighted and the balls are too weak to not them down and you end up losing your money or winning a prize that’s less than the cost of the game. Joey then stopped the girl about to walk off and said “don’t you want a game?” She then introduced herself as Olive and had a go at the game. She didn’t really like the game and Joey could see she didn’t like it. Joey managed to win a fluffy toy prize which he gave to her and then they went off to get some food. There was a hill over looking the funfair and the theme park in the background where they decided to sit and eat their chips and sausages. Olive complained she was feeling cold and Joey put his arm around her.
Joey and Olive now finished their food sit there for a moment enjoying the view and Olive just sitting in Joey’s arms. Joey then introduces himself properly and tells her his age and that he is here in a caravan with his parents. She tells him that she is 20 years old and that she is also down there with family. To his surprise she lives in Teddington quite near to Twickenham. They talk about music taste and the movies they like. Then a silence fills the air as they are staring into each others eyes and their heart is beating and their surroundings become but a blur and their heads move closer, and their lips touch. The kiss seems to last forever and it seems to both as the perfect kiss and perfect moment.

The kiss comes to a natural end and they start to pull away, both eyes opening at the same time, looking each other in the eyes, a smile on Olive and a whisper from Joey saying “that was wonderful”. Now in silence both unsure of what to say for fear of breaking this perfect moment they are sharing. They lay back in each others arms and both still unable to speak fall a sleep.

The couple awake to a now closed funfair and being awoke by a member of staff. They slowly walk towards the exit aware the night is coming to an end and both wanting the moment to last forever. Joey asks Olive where she would like him to walk her to hoping to hear they are staying close. Hearing from her lips that they are staying in the same caravan site is wonderful. The couple now about to part say simultaneously “what you doing tomorrow?” with that they decide to meet early in the morning.

SATURDAY
Both awake early having not had much sleep, thinking of the night before. Joey ignoring his parents offers of breakfast and rushing out the door to where he is to meet Olive. Olive doing her make up wanting to look perfect for this new man she has met and cannot stop thinking about. Both arrive early with fear of having to leave the other one waiting, Joey first then Olive. Silence again as they see each other for the first time in what seems like ages. Both to break the since talk simultaneously and greet each other. Knowing that today will be there only full day together and they both are going home the next day, they want make this day perfect. “So what have you got planned for me today?” says Olive, Joey staring back at his beautiful dark haired girl in front of him replies “anything, everything, I would as long as I do it with you”.

Olive suggests a walk and they decide to go for a walk through the fields. A sound of a shotgun in the distance the couple decide to walk and see what is happening. The couple walking holding hands and in each others arms arrive at a field with “Do not trespass” written on a sign. The field is full of corn and in the distance is thatched roof summer house. The couple being to walk through the field and pick then eat some of the raw corn. The tastes nice and they both haven’t eaten anything since the night before, so are both quite hungry. They sit down for a while each eating some raw corn before starting to walk again down the ally like ways between the high corn crops.

Suddenly gun shots are heard and the couple shake as they are close by. They then hear a man shouting to get off his land. The couple now scared run towards the summer house and although they can’t see anything behind them feel as though they are being chased. They arrive at the summer house and then quickly climb up into the thatched roof. Both scared and their hearts beating fast and their breathing heavily trying to catch their breath. They hear the sound of someone running and look through a gap in the roof and see a man holding a gun. He runs into the summer house the couple hold their breath and hope he goes away. After what seems like eternity the man leaves and the couple can breathe again. Sweat running down each other they begin to kiss and the moment feels perfect and they make love.

The couple now lying exhausted with Olive lying on Joey’s chest in a bed of hay. The couple now speechless to the sensational feels they have just felt. They share a kiss and just lay in each others arms till they feel it is right to talk. Olive speaks and says “words cannot say for what was just experienced” Joey still speechless says “It was perfect, your perfect, when we go home tomorrow I want us to move in together or something”. Olive tells him of how she has quite a big house and that he could possibly move in with her. How that her farther passed away a few years back and that the house is too big for just her and her mother. The couple share another kiss and lay down for a while.

The couple then get down from the roof and head towards the town. They are both thirsty and requiring the toilet. The couple walk in each others arms and find a small town near the corn field. The couple go in a local café and but a drink and something to eat and use the toilet. The couple now leave and find a local public house. They decide to have a few drinks together and enjoy the rest of the afternoon just holding each other in the pub garden.

The couple leave the pub slightly intoxicated and go back to their caravan to get something warmer before heading to the funfair again. The couple now at the funfair decide to get a beer and some chips and sit back on their hill. Sitting on the hill where they had their first kiss in each others arms kissing and cuddling just looking into each others eyes. The moment is again perfect and Joey asks “what should be do know want to play some games?” Olive replies and tells him she wants to go in the abandoned theme park. Joey suggests they wait till later due to the amount of people around. The couple spend the evening drinking beers and spending money on the games. The time is getting late and the funfair is closing. The couple leave the funfair and wait till everyone has gone.

SUNDAY
Its now early morning and the couple attempt to get into the old derelict theme park. The couple find a wall that is not that high and push some crates up to it to help them climb over. Once in they are both scared and the theme park is lit only by moon light. The atmosphere is almost silent with only a slight sound of movement by animals in the distance. The couple walk around the theme park and look at all the old rides and signs. The look is very creepy yet intriguing there is rubbish on the floor boarded up stall windows. There are buildings in different states of decay and plants over growing through the floor.
The couple now starring a giant Ferris wheel, Olive says “I want to make love on the top of that Ferris wheel. Joey a bit shocked at what she just said wonders if it is safe but says “are you sure”. The couple then decide to climb up to the top. It is very easy due to the way it is built. The couple climb to the top and climb into the top carriage. The couple is astonished by the view from up that high. The couple start to kiss and cuddle and make love in the top carriage.

The couple are again sitting in each others arms still feeling the sensation that just happened. They kiss and Olive whispers to Joey “I want to spend the rest of my life with you” Joey smiles and the couple get dressed. Olive then shouts out “this is the best holiday ever!” whist leaning on the side of the cart. Joey concerned about the movement of the carriage says be careful and stands up. Olive says “is safe babe” and shakes the side and it gives way. Joey quickly runs to grab Olive before she falls but only manages to grab her arm. Olive is now hanging under the carriage unable to get up, screaming for her life. Joey crying as he is trying to hold on to her but unable to keep a tight grip. The both of them unable to get up crying and screaming for help realise that Olives arm is slipping. Joey tries to move and pull her up but just ends up sliding closer to the hole. Olive realising that she may not be able to survive is this moment holding on for her life. Then the carriage slips and Joey’s grip is lost. Olive falls to the floor with a thud and the atmosphere turn silent with the only sound of Joeys beating heart. Joey quickly climbs down and rushes to see if Olive is okay. Joey quickly calling an ambulance from his mobile and giving them the details when he hears Olive say “Help me”. Joey now is so happy that Olive is alive, rushes and picks her head up to kiss her only to notice the back of here head is wet from blood. Knowing that she may die the couple crying, and Joey screaming for the ambulance to hurry up, when Olive says “I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you”. Joey now clenching at Olive crying says “me to babe, me to”. Olive is now motionless and Joey crying over her, when Joey hears the sound of an ambulance. Joey tells Olive she will be okay but it is too late when the ambulance crew come they say she is already gone. Joey is now shocked and unable to really comprehend what has just happened breaks down in tears.

I am a man, men are meant to be strong, I wasn’t strong enough to save the love of my life, am I strong enough to go on?


The End


I have never read or written a romantic story and have never really written a story before. This was cut shorter to allow for more readers. The story is meant to be a perfect week but due to me not knowing what to fill a perfect week with I decided to make it a weekend. The word fill is key as I did not want to just fill the week up but make it the perfect week. I would find it hard to create such a perfect week without it appearing as I had just filled it with events that can happen. I wanted it to be real.

I wanted to capture the feeling of having found true love and it being torn away whist they are still confused by the feelings they have for each other. If the death would have happened much after they met it would not have been the same. Getting back to Eastenders Bradley dies on the night of his wedding this is a tragic feeling which I feel almost captures what I had wanted to write down or so long. The story is loosely based on my life, being chased in a field was real I was chased running with a girl when I was around 13 years old. We ran and hid in a summer house roof. I feel the derelict theme park could have been lost and replaced by the closed funfair. The name of the girl may also be better suited with another more common name. I hope you enjoyed the story. This story was written with help by a friend of mine a girl called Jo Jo/Joey.

Youtube Video The Soul Paradox - A Thought Experiment by vdizhoor

This video talks about an idea I really like: The cloning earth theory a while back that wrote is similar. What if the world we lived in was cloned yet the clone was made with slight differences. When was the last time you woke up to see something a little different yet you just accepted it?

Holidays

This post is smaller than a normal post so I will also add a YouTube video that I really liked but did NOT make. The video and the theory are not the same. In the future I may post other videos I like.

Brakes, Holidays, vacations, leave, trips, rest or what ever one call’s them. They are time away from doing what one normally does. But is this really needed or required? The body to rest requires sleep and food to allow it to live. Yet people feel the need to have brakes and holidays for sometimes months at a time. Is there really a need to have a holiday? If there really is a need to have a holiday and it is required to be outside of the normal comfit zone then why do people go around the world? Excluding education and experience is there a real reason to go around the world?

This post is probably one of the mainly narrow minded posts I have written so far. The point is not that holidays are bad or that people should take them but more so that is there a real reason to going on holiday for months in some place you know nothing about? I view holiday’s abroad as an expense and something that does not really attract me. I see it as Spain will always be there if I want to go to Spain and say “I have been to Spain” I can go anytime and if I die before I do then I have not really missed out on anything as someone else has likely seen it and spread the word. What I am interested in doing is exploring places that no one has seen or even thinks possible. I don’t like the subject history yet I would love to time travel…

The internet is us

For ages I had the theory we was only five minutes old. This was based on the fact everything we know is from memories and there is no way of proving something is that old without relying on memory. People reading this is likely think of carbon dating or their wedding day etc. But those are memories if your wedding day did not happen or carbon dating was not invented you would not know. The problem is people remember hearing about such and such or even have done such and such. If such and such never happened and memory was faked then we wouldn’t know how to approach anything.

I am only twenty one if my memory is right this is the first time I have said my age on my blog. Every time I want to know something I look it up in the internet for that it is easy for me to relate to this theory. What if we created ourselves and the internet is us. We think and can easily prove things happened before the internet yet the internet was the beginning of time itself. This theory is very hard to believe and I have very little to argue it but think about the following movie similarly.

A movie is created with background, and a movie is created in that we can relate to the characters and quickly believe we know them. A television show can take it further and really build on this and show the characters to be more life like. A soap opera can build even more. Now think about this, what if we could create a way to insert the memory of knowing the people on the television into the minds of the viewers? No back story and no having to over explain the past to the viewer. The viewer would be able to relate to the characters as if they knew them in real life. With this kind of access to the memory of the viewer it may become harder to understand what is or is not real. Children pretending to an action character with full memory of that characters life. If ten years of memory of a fictional character could be implanted into a five year old child then why wouldn’t the child believe it was that fictional character? Surely the memory used in this situation would be third person and not first person but all the same it may allow problems to be caused.

Now getting back to the internet and how we are the internet. If someone was to create a world in which everyone inside it believed they was real. The best way to create that would be to create history and background to make the story more believable. If everyone was put on an empty world and told to create something out of nothing what is stopping them doing completely nothing? To improve the chances of the characters of this created world living and creating and solving the problems they are presented with the internet is granted to them. The internet, a resource where by they can access the knowledge presented by the greater power and fool the readers into thinking it was created by them. The internet allows the characters of this reality to commutate, learn, educate others and be entertained. There was so much before the internet wasn’t there?

Mixed Messages

Have you ever had that disorientation that comes from having a conversation or having a memory of a conversation that never happened? Maybe you were in a shop and the person was saying they sold an item only to say later the item doesn’t exist. This is not a conversation where they just changed their mind. This is a conversation where they said something but it was later reedited.

Thinking back to computer patches this could be a conversation that is bringing up deleted features. If these features were so big that it could trigger memories or thoughts about those lost features then conversations about them should be removed.

An example, a simulated world allows the people of that world to fly, then it seems flying is causing problems and is removed. Everyone still has memories of flying so that is removed, but flying is still very big and birds can trigger memories. To not have to remove birds and everything that flies conversations about people flying is just changed. These changes are very careful to only modify the general idea of the conversation and not remove all of it.

Next time you think you hear someone say something only for them to later tell you they didn’t consider what would be different if they did.

The patching process

Last week the idea that all humans are connected and that there may be a way of contacting each other by other unknown ways. This post is much like that only taking it one step further than even the internet has gone.

The internet is a network of devices mainly computers. There are a lot of people who wish that the internet will allow them to, check if their oven is on and be able to turn it off from work, check their garage door is locked, open and close windows around the house etc. This kind of control is very much like how much like what could happen with out network of humans.

Consider that this world is controlled from another world. Much that like computers can be remotely accessed but everything including the location of your mobile phone is controllable by this network. Now consider this. There is an ultimate truth that is hiding and being covered up completely.

Think of a program that is forever getting patched because errors are present. This program that we call reality is one of those programs forever being patched. The problem is some people are completely artificial and others are just like me and you real but a prisoner in this program.

I don’t know how the patching works but what I think does happen is that it happens very fast. I call it the bed sheet patching method. The error is made, and sheet is placed over it covering the error. The person who is going to get into the bed will not see anything and if they did see something then they would be told a lie and made to believe it. The person gets in and does not know anything about the error. The process happens fast and the person getting into bed does not remember anything about the error. Think about more and more sheets covering up this error. Now apply this process to a street. A window has a big sign saying the answer to life, that window is removed a new window is placed. The non-artificial people walk past and do not see anything and those that do will consider it impossible and accept anything to make what happened possible, or simply forget.

There are people who will disagree with everything to do with the truth and choose not to believe at all. There are some who are open minded and will accept the truth like me, and there are some that wants there to be a truth so much that they will make their own truth up even though it is false. Some people reading this may feel I am the latter but I consider the latter as people who may be classed as having schizophrenia or some other mental health disorder. I do however feel they may know something they could be learnt or saw an error but tried ever so hard to remember it.

If you become aware of the process you will see an error and you will know the error is an error but 5 minutes later you will completely forget it. Even if you try to write it down you go “what was that?” and have forgotten it. I feel there must be a way to remember these errors and learn the truth.